Scrubbing Bubbles With Chicken

Are you tired of breaking your back to keep those filthy bathrooms clean? Well, why not trade some of that elbow grease for the scrubbly bubble cleaning power of Scrub-O-Shine from Bergman and Sachs?

Our powerful cleaning formula penetrates deep down and breaks up dirt and oil with our patented deep super clean technology.

So try the scrubbly bubbles of Scrub-O-Shine, now with chicken.

There. Right there.

Right where?

Right there. It said with chicken.

Um, no it didn't.

Do you want me to play it again?

No, we've played it three times and each time we didn't hear it.

So try the scrubbly bubbles of scrub-o-shine, now with chicken.

Oh, that's what you're talking about?

Yes, that's what I'm talking about. The part in our new commercial where it says our product is made with chicken.

Nobody's gonna notice that.

People will notice that.

I didn't notice it.

I noticed it.

Yeah, but not till like the third time we watched it.

No, that was you.

Nobody's gonna care that it says there's chicken in it.

People will care. Salmonella's like one of the main reasons why people clean things.

You just want me to go back down to the studio and redo it.

Well, yeah.

Aw, are you serious? You want me to go all the way back down to the studio just because the stupid commercial says chicken?

Look, the commercial can't say with chicken. It has nothing to do with our product. I don't even know how it got in there.

Well, neither do I.

Well, let's take a look at the script then. Right there. It says, with chicken. Someone wrote it right on the page.

Okay, so because of that, I have to go all the way back down to the studio and redo it?

Dylan, the studio is one floor down.

Yeah, but I hate it there. Everyone sucks. Everyone at this whole company sucks!

Everyone at this whole company does not suck.

Yeah, huh. I hate it here. Wish this whole place would burn to the ground.

I really wish you would stop saying that, Dylan. This is your company. I've told you this before, but if you don't want to come in, you don't have to. We are perfectly capable of handling the day-to-day operations on our own.

But if you're going to come in, I just really wish you'd help us out. And the commercial just can't say chicken.

Fine, whatever. I should fire the crap out of you.

Please don't. I'm just trying to do what's best for the product.

Hey, Dylan.

Uuuuugh

Hey, thanks for sending me that email on my birthday.

I didn't send you any email, Heidi. It was probably my secretary.

You want me to get you a soda or something?

I don't know. Figure it out, all right?

Hey, Mr. Schroeder, how's it going?

Can't say chicken.

Okay, so you want us to record a version without saying chicken? That's a good idea. We can do that. Uh, Steve?

Yeah?

Uh, we're gonna go ahead and record a version without saying chicken.

Good... It's a damn shame, though.

So try new Scrubbly Bubbles from Scrub-o-Shine!

I'm gonna lay that down. All right, that was great.

Wait.

Yes, Dylan?

Do one that says macaroni.

Say what now?

I said do one that says macaroni.

You want me to say now with macaroni?

No, just say macaroni!

Macaroni!

Now put that in there.

Uh, where do you want me to put it?

I don't know, like in between scrubly or bubbles or something.

Alright, so you wanted to say "scrubly macaroni bubbles".

Well Dylan, you finally did it. You got one of those ridiculous commercials past me, and now our stock price is plummeting.

Sorry to say, but this company's gonna have to go under. By this time next week, we'll all be out of a job.

Whatever. Suck it, losers.

Eh, I don't think he was trying to commit suicide.