theSketchDb

Stork Factory

7 1 rating

Info

A worker in a baby factory named Doug (Trevor) keeps sending babies to overpopulated places and to mothers that can't afford babies. When one of his higher-ups (Sam) confronts him about this behavior, he begins killing babies.

Quotes

0:45
Brian (Sam Brown)

The guys upstairs seem to think that the world's good on babies for a little while.

0:50
Doug (Trevor Moore)

But Brian, you can never have too many babies.

0:53
Brian (Sam Brown)

No, Doug, you can. The planet's having a tough enough time sustaining the human population as it is. That's why world hunger's a thing.

1:01
Brian (Sam Brown)

And if we were going to point fingers, it'd kind of be your fault.

1:05
Doug (Trevor Moore)

But people love having babies. To India! To India! To India! Away, Stark! Away!

1:13
Brian (Sam Brown)

That's another thing, Doug. Places you're sending these babies don't exactly need more babies.

1:20
Doug (Trevor Moore)

I don't quite know what you're getting at, Brian. To a 14-year-old girl in Ohio! Away!

1:27
Brian (Sam Brown)

See, you just need to show some more discretion to where you're sending them.

1:30
Doug (Trevor Moore)

To some woman with AIDS! Away!

2:12
Darren Trumeter

Did you fire Doug?

2:16
Zach Cregger

How'd it go?

2:18
Brian (Sam Brown)

Well, the thing about that is Doug's crazy.

2:24
Zach Cregger

What did he do?

2:25
Brian (Sam Brown)

He threw a tantrum and started stabbing all the babies.

2:39
Doug (Trevor Moore)

Sorry babies, there's just too many of you, apparently. To Long Island... to Long Island... to Long Island...

+2
3:40
Doug, Brian

Can't you see that children are our future? Let the storks come bring back our babies.

+2
3:46
Doug, Brian

Can't you see that children are our future? Please Brian let Doug keep making babies.

4:07
Zach Cregger

That song sucks.