theSketchDb

Good Cop, Terrible Cop

6 1 rating

Info

Deleted sketch found on the third season DVD.

Quotes

0:11
Suspect (Timmy Williams)

I'm not telling you pigs nothing. Kaboosh.

0:14
Cop (Sam Brown)

You greasy Italians make me want to puke! You're all a bunch of fat slacker criminal scum.

0:22
Cop (Sam Brown)

Each and every one of you does nothing but break the law and cause trouble for the working man.

0:28
Suspect (Timmy Williams)

Yeah, that's right. We do. You got a problem with that? Pizzeria...

0:32
Cop (Sam Brown)

Well, just laugh it up, because your buddy already sold you out.

0:35
Suspect (Timmy Williams)

What?

0:36
Cop (Sam Brown)

He sang like a canary. He placed you there the night of the murder! He sold you down the river!

0:43
Cop (Zach Cregger)

No, he didn't. Steven, no, he didn't. He didn't. What?

1:00
Suspect (Trevor Moore)

I was nowhere near the scene of the crime on the night that horrible accident happened. Instead, I was shopping for perfume at the Louvre with Gerard Depredou.

1:16
Cop (Zach Cregger)

I believe him, Steven.

1:18
Cop (Sam Brown)

Will you just let me handle this?

1:19
Cop (Zach Cregger)

I don't know. I just think he's telling the truth.

1:22
Cop (Sam Brown)

We have three eyewitnesses. We have surveillance tapes. Cardozzi stop it.

1:28
Suspect (Trevor Moore)

Like popular American rap musician Shaggy says, it wasn't me.

1:35
Cop (Zach Cregger)

You like Shaggy? Steven, we cannot lock up a fellow shag head! What? Are you serious?