theSketchDb

Teachercide

4 1 rating

Info

One of WKUK's more irreverent sketches which didn't make it to TV for some reason.

Quotes

0:08
Teacher (Zach Cregger)

I'm afraid I have some bad news. Your teacher, Mr. McCarthy, has passed on. He's dead.

0:19
Student (Sam Brown)

Yes!

0:24
Student (Sam Brown)

We had a test today. Score.

0:26
Teacher (Zach Cregger)

Okay, we're still going to be taking the test, Matthew.

0:29
Student (Sam Brown)

What? Why? Our teacher just died! We're morning! Show some respect, a man is dead here!

0:40
Student (Sam Brown)

I can't believe we had to sit here and take this test when our teacher was poisoned.

0:44
Teacher (Zach Cregger)

Um, I didn't say he was poisoned, Matthew.

0:58
Student (Sam Brown)

Mr. McCarthy, you're alive!

1:00
Teacher (Trevor Moore)

I thought it was you who put that antifreeze in my large blue sports aid, and now, you're going to detention.

1:04
Teacher (Zach Cregger)

For attempted teachercide.

1:38
Teacher (Trevor Moore)

You don't teach for 25 years in the public schooling system by falling for every high-jinks-and-snot-nosed-mouth-breathing-bitch kid that wants to do you it.

1:48
Teacher (Trevor Moore)

You wanna whack me? Get in line.

1:52
Student (Sam Brown)

Alright, Mr. M. I'm big enough to know what I've repeated.

1:58
Student (Sam Brown)

A toast to the smartest teacher that has ever lived.

2:05
Teacher (Trevor Moore)

Flattery will get you everywhere, my boy.