Sketch Info
Part 1 of Ghost Tea Bag
A fortune teller (Darren) reads Zach's palm and sees several spirits around him, one of which is "tea bagging" him.
Cast & Characters
Medium
Darren Trumeter
· Cast
Client
Zach Cregger
· Cast
Quotes
Medium (Darren Trumeter)
One of the spirits has his balls on your head.
Client (Zach Cregger)
What?
Medium (Darren Trumeter)
You know that thing with friends when you go up behind somebody and you just plop your balls on their head?
Client (Zach Cregger)
He's teabagging me?
Medium (Darren Trumeter)
Kinda, sorta, yeah.
Client (Zach Cregger)
Did he stop?
Medium (Darren Trumeter)
No.
Medium (Darren Trumeter)
Now he's just pretending to all the other spirits that your head feels really good on his balls.
Client (Zach Cregger)
What did he do?
Medium (Darren Trumeter)
Well, now he did that thing, you know, when you grab the skin of your balls and you hold it up so it looks like a bow tie, but really it's just his balls on your head.
Client (Zach Cregger)
How long has this been going on?
Medium (Darren Trumeter)
Well, uh, Spirit, how long have you been doing this? Oh, three weeks.
Client (Zach Cregger)
Three weeks?! Three weeks he's had his balls on my head?!
Medium (Darren Trumeter)
The Spirit just thinks that it's really funny to have his balls on your head.
Client (Zach Cregger)
I don't know how I'm gonna function in life knowing I'm being teabagged by a ghost!
Client (Zach Cregger)
I am so glad I came to this bullshit palm reading.
Medium (Darren Trumeter)
Well, don't you want to know about your promotion?
Client (Zach Cregger)
I have phantom gonads on my forehead. I have bigger fish to fry!
Medium (Darren Trumeter)
You're gonna get it!
Client (Zach Cregger)
Fuck you!